Another BruthaDiva session...

Don’t say ‘I love you’ first.

This kind of advice does nothing to help women. Although I had a friend once who told a guy that she loved him and his response was ‘thanks.’ Hearing "thanks" in response to "I love you" is NOT the end of the world. As adults, we need to understand that sometimes we have feelings for people that aren’t mutual and vice versa (dont get me wrong I would be a bit pissed too, lol).

If you tell someone that you love them, it should be because you actually feel that way, not because you expect them to feel the same way or to hear it in return. You definitely shouldn’t settle for a one-sided relationship, but if it’s sort of early into your relationship, give the person time. That’s where common sense comes in. "Love" is an action word so you will know if the man is falling for you (or if he isn’t interested) based on how he treats you.

Ladies,I wouldn’t suggest being aggressive but I hear some guys like that so to each his own! But holding back just because you fear rejection isn’t helpful either.

Myth 1: Men don’t know how to behave in a relationship. It is up to a woman to be patient and "teach" him how to treat her.

This theory only works in TV Land people. I know that we’ve all heard that you subconsciously teach someone how to treat you by what you accept (and don’t) from your boy/girlfriend. And I totally agree. However, a man knows whether or not he’s in a committed relationship.

- He will stop ‘getting jiggy’ with his ex
- He will call if he’s going to cancel a date
- Spending time with him and his friends does not = quality time for the two of you
- Collecting phone numbers & going on dates with other women is a no go area

And ladies don't be stupid and provide excuses like..."but this is his first serious relationship and he’s learning...blah blah blah"

Some dudes will try and play dumb but trust, he’s just trying to see what you’ll allow him to get away with.

Myth 2: Things may be a little rocky in the beginning, but things will change.

Not gonna happen. If you've just started seeing each other and he’s always "busy", giving you excuses as to why he can’t return your calls, or why he didnt make it to that meeting then two years from now things will be the same. If you continue to ignore the little things that irritate you at the beginning you cant really complain or try to change him later. Either accept it or find someone else who has time for you.

Myth 3: A man can completely fool you if you’re a victim.

How many women do you know that are or always completely blinded by men? Women are always talking about being used or cheated on by their men but there are always signs of "doginess"(is that a word??..lol) but its up to you if you chose to ignore them. For example if you've never seen where he lives and you've been together for 8 months...this is a clear red warning! lol

This doesn’t give your boyfriend the excuse to be a complete prick, neither does it mean you should be critical of everyone you meet. Its simple, common sense should be our guide.

Myth 4: A man should accept you for who you are.

Not necessarily. Are you the best you that you can be? Are you difficult? What is your character? How do you treat people in your life? In most circumstances you should be accepted for who you are, but not if you’re crazy. We can always better ourselves and sometimes it takes someone we love to do that.

Now I know a few people are going to have a problem with what I've said in todays session. So leave a comment and i'll tell you why your wrong...lol!

Peace

- BruthaDiva