I Saw This And Thought Of You...

I know we havent posted in a while...truth is there aint been anything important to mention. But a friend sent me this and you lot know how i like to share!!

- SistaLova

We Do Exist!!

I've been sitting on this one for a while, looking for the ideal time to post it. Not to say its the right time now but i know some of you have been missing me. Unfortunately, I can't take credit for it, it was e-mailed to me at a time when I needed to read it.
It's an open letter addressed to women letting them know that there are good black men out there. I'd like to think that I am a good black man and hope someone out there will co-sign that for me. All the media shows is the drug dealers/users and the men that degrade women. The only black men you see on the news, or in the papers are the murderers, convicts, rapist or the athletes on the back page. It's is rare that you see a positive image of a black man on television. I for one think that everyone needs to stop glorifying the bad and start uplifting the good. Then again, I am just one man. I hope this post reminds you of at least one person in your life, and if it does, feel free to tell us about him so everyone can know that we do exist!

Everyone receiving this either:


1. Is a good black man

2. Has a good black man

3. Will be blessed with a good black man soon

4. Has met a Good Black Man; but failed to recognise him.


Good Black Men are indeed all around us. We pass them on the streets, in the shops and the halls at work. Most we can't see because we don't know what a good man really looks like. He usually isn't flashy enough, or rich enough to turn our heads. He might not wear a suit or push a Lexus. He might not have "a body like Tyson with a Denzel face". But, as you mature; you realize it's better to find someone who's got your back rather than someone who turns your head.

A good man doesn't agree wholeheartedly with everything you say. He doesn't just tell you what you want to hear and do the opposite. He doesn't declare how sensitive, sweet, caring, sincere, blah, blah he is (He won't have to because it shows). He has his own opinions and yours may clash, but he doesn't have to degrade you to prove he's right. He even admits at times to being wrong, especially if you are willing to do the same.

A good man is not going to meet every item on your checklist. He is human with frailties and faults mixed in with all of his wonderful, strong attributes. He needs your love and respect.
~~~~~~~~~~He needs to feel that you don't live to catch him doing something wrong so you can declare, Aha! I knew you were a dog!!

A good man isn't insecure about his women having great achievements. In fact he is her number one supporter and becomes disappointed with her when she begins to lose herself, for the sake of not hurting his feelings, or just want to make him happy. His happiness comes with seeing her excel in her dreams and accomplishing her goals. For as she excels and is exalted, a good woman will bring her good man right along with her. A good man doesn't necessarily give you a huge birthday or Valentine's gift. He shows his love in the ways that are comfortable to him.

Don't judge him by TV standards. No one is really living a fairy-tale. You'll miss out on your own fairy tale by buying into the myth that our men are no good. It's Just not true. Black Men, we salute you, and thank you for who you are and all you've done.

- BruthaDiva

The Latest

Even though my name is 'crush hoe', I've only REALLY liked a few guys in my lifetime. SCOUT'S HONOUR! (even though I was never a scout).

So now - this guy I'm talking to, rightly named 'my first love' is my mind's focus at this moment in time. I can't believe that I still like him after so long, I mean I had a little crush on him when I was younger but as I said 'it was a crush', I would've expected to get over it by now - but I still like him.

The story is that I hadn't seen him in YEARS but it was only recently that we got back in contact with each other. So we talked on the phone for a few months and arranged a few dates but every single one fell through, (both our faults really). Now, I'm supposed to meet him and all I can say is 'WHATEVER'

I KNOW!!! After all that and I don't even care anymore, I really can't be bothered. It kinda gets to me that I'm not excited but then again I think I have reason not to be. Failed dates, when we talk there isn't much conversation, the fact that I still haven't seen him, I don't think you can blame me for not being excited. And despite all that I've said, I know exactly why I don't want to be excited - I might meet him and find out that I actually don't like him. That would crush me, it really would. Imagine me, liking him all this time, secretly hoping that he might be the ONE, only to find out that 'WE' could never happen. It would crush me.... and my mum. LOL. My mum absolutely adores him, come to think of it - so does my DAD. But I won't know anything 'til the end of this week - and I'm apprehensive. Apprehensive because next week could be the start of a new sector in my life. I might no longer be a 'crush hoe' - Gabrielle might actually settle down.

'YEAH RIGHT', I hear you say, but it could happen. NEVER SAY NEVER.

Oh yeah - what do I wear? I want to look nice but don't want to come off as desperate. Oh my!! Gabrielle actually cares what people think this time ( I must really like him). I want him to at least see an improvement in me since the last time he saw me - party dress and hairband to match. MEMORIES!!!

- Gabrielle

P.P.S my laptops gone until after exams so I might not be posting until I get some other computer access so if I don't write for a while, you know why!! KISSES x x x

Kick 'Mr Potential' to the curb...Apparently

For some reason I seem to have a lot of time on my hands, cause every time I post, I've either watched or read something that I have to share and guess what...Today is no exception! The title just struck me so I had to read it,
KICK MR POTENTIAL TO THE CURB! (I couldn't believe it...When u finally find 'Mr right' whoever he may be, why would you want to let go?)

Yes, that sounds harsh, But this is the man you like and could learn to love. This is a guy who has drama. He is a walking headache. This guy is the one you run from like the wind. Life wont get any better with this guy. The only person that can help him is himself! Mr Potential has to create his own life. You cant try to make it for him. He has to get past the potential and learn to be a man for himself, by himself
You then think to yourself "do I want to be happy or do I want to survive?" Life is more then survival. Go for the happiness and kick Mr. Potential with no ambition to the curb.

So im sitting there thinking OH, the distinction has to be made between Mr Potential and Mr Right. Mr Potential has the qualities to become Mr Right but is not quite there...hmmm so im reminiscing about my past relations and conclude that I seem to be confusing Mr Right (a.k.a the guy I've never met)with actual Mr Potential's ( a.k.a my ex-boyfriend)? That could explain my single status now (which I have no problem with...sometimes) but then again, how do you differentiate the two when the characteristics seem so similar? Am I confusing u? Because I sure am confused! Is it really possible to kick 'Mr Potential' to the curb, cant I just train him to being a Mr Superb?....Nah, these books on life lessons can only be taken so far, look at me trying to re-evaluate future relationships, let me just leave it up to whatever God has planned.

x_soul sista_x

Why AfroDivas was created?

AfroDivas was created so that we could voice our opinions, our thoughts, random feelings we had which we wanted to share with others. In creating such a blog, we decided that we would allow readers to post comments and voice their own opinion on whatever we had said. So you could say we gave readers the chance to say their piece. Compared to some blogs I've come across, we just don't leave comments that portray our blogs to be perfect, cos it's far from that... I mean we're only writing about how we feel. You can't blame us for that.

So, with saying that Im gonna wrap this up. To the faithful readers, thanks for reading, thanks for visiting the site. We greatly appreciated the fact that you continued to read our blogs. But we are sorry to say that AfroDivas has now ended. Due to numerous comments prior to the last blog, we have all concluded to stop writing. Again, we would like to thank you for your support and your insightful comments.

God Bless x x x


OH PUURRLLEASSEEEEE!! No one could get rid of this blog even if they tried. Basically, it's like this... you like the site, by all means stop by when it suits you, read our posts, leave a comment if needs be, but please, PLEASE don't be ignorant. I mean if you don't agree with what has been said in a post please don't be immature about it and leave a wack ass comment, 'anonymous' - 'this is some weak blog'. NO!! You know what you should do, leave a comment telling us why you don't agree with what was said and what you would do in that situation. It's called 'constructive criticism'... then again, if you still don't agree with what's said on a post... leave the site. I know you see that red 'X' button on the top right corner... I aint gonna be mad at you for using it. DAMMMNNNN!!! So yeah, we're gonna keep the posts coming and hopefully you guys won't stop reading.

AU REVOIR

- Gabrielle

Looks sooo fine....err...nah!

Have you every looked back at people you had crushes on and thought
....what was i thinking? or ....what happened?
Because thats what happened to me yesterday when i bumped into this boy i had a BIG thing for. I remember when he was the cutest guy in my class...sort of like a young Will Smith (he had those cute ears too!) lol. But i guess time was not kind to him, let me give you a description...his face had aged considerably i almost didnt recognise him! his head was a sideways oval shape and his torso was half the size it should be, also sideways oval shaped. *sigh* I swear I nearly jumped back, and before you guys get all judgemental on me, never did I claim to be a beauty queen...but I'm HONEST people!

I also remember he was one of the smartest and most athletic people in my class, i always thought of him as being really sucessful one day. So while we were talking i asked him all the typical questions, what he was doing now? etc.. Basically he is now a father of two with the third on the way and he used to work at a corner shop, but was now in the process of choosing a new career path (unemployed).

Maybe he was never really that cute, i mean this was a crush back in primary school!! I have always been a fan of dark chocolate skinned bruthas and i went to a school that was 98.5% white. So the lack of chocolate made me find anything attractive, lol.

Its another story of a really smart black man who isnt reaching his full potential, a shame really 'cos he had the abitlity to do anything.
I guess it was naive of me to think everyone that i knew would be happy and successful.

- SistaLova

Seven Deadly Sins Of Sisterhood

Hmm, in light of recent 'comments' i thought i might bring this topic to the surface. I was watchin the Tyra show awhile back, and she came up with this concept, i was very intrigued.
1. Envy
2. Judgement
3. Resentment
4. Manipulation
5. Betrayal
6. Competition
7. Gossip
Now, after she had identified all the deadly sins of sisterhood, i could not help but think at least 5 of those 7 applied to me. I can remember occasions, a couple years back where i have envied, been judgemental and gossiped like there was no tomorrow! But now i ask myself what did i possibly achieve by being like that? I lost a couple of true sisters, partied more and lost faith. After a much deserved break, i took the time to re-evaluate past experiences in my life and what stood out the most is that ive nearly lost true sistas over guys. (KMT) So, i'll make this short and sweet and ask...
Which sin have you been guilty of committing, or a victim of?

and leave you with the words of tyra
'Stop negativity and competition and support one another.'


x-soul sista-x

Week 2

Lesson 2: Leave playing mind games to children. It doesn't work on girls... or guys for that matter. I would really like to know where 'mind games' started from (I mean between the opposite sex) 'cos it causes so many problems that could have been avoided. So yeah, if you like a guy, just tell him you like him, what's the worst that could happen? lol, lol. OK many things could happen but not enough to make you feel like doo-doo for the rest of your life. LIFE GOES ON!! And same applies to the guys, if you like a girl, just tell her, there's nothing worse than you dropping hints for months only to see the girl you really like, go out with another guy. so take what I have said and let it marinate/marinade (didn't know which word was correct in this context) in your head. Whilst I tell you what happened to me in Week 2. ENJOY!!!

Still in London, catching up with friends, life was good during this week, I felt so popular. People had ‘heard it through the grapevine’ that I was back on ends, so naturally I was getting called every minute being asked ‘what you on’ for the day… so I guess I could say I was out most of the time… enjoying myself. But one thing that I noticed which I only got to deal with directly was the fact that when I like someone, they NEVER show me that they like me back at that moment. I always feel like I’m the only one showing a certain interest… so before long I’m over them. You guys already know my nickname ‘crush hoe’, so the fact that I got over this guy wasn’t a problem. Now I liked this guy in college right to when I started uni but he wasn't showing me nothing back… so you know the routine... I forgot about him QUICKTIME. NOW, it wasn’t until I went back to London that week that I found out he had liked me all along. KMT why couldn’t he just tell me that he liked me… rather than playing stupid games. You see, I don’t understand ‘hints’ really I don’t… I usually don’t even know when a guy is ‘chirpsin’ me because I just usually think they’re being friendly. I think nothing of subtle talk, unless a guy comes up to me with the blatant lines ‘can I have your number’ and he hasn’t even asked my name that’s when I know he’s chirpsin me. So yeah, this guy tried to tell me how I never showed him love, and so he moved on… kmt. After I know I told him I liked him - Oh well!! That's life!! Next week... new story, new lesson.

CIAO

- Gabrielle

What clothes cant you stand on the opposite sex?

Moving on from the 'Money and Love' issue, I was going through a magazine and i came across this topic, it had me stitches! One guy said (and i quote:)
'Dem short mini skirts wiv dem leggin things underneath..Mini Skirts are an access ting, so why wear it den put trousers underneath dat jus makes things complicated!'
I literally could not breathe, (there was more said about big panties and tracksuits but that was a bit 2 deep) i thought to myself, Is he serious? So i decided to think what clothes i cant bear to see on guys and i was thinking for about an hour! So where shall i begin...
First off the biggest issue i have is da trousers that HANG off a guys arse, 'Dont look den', i hear u say, Well, wen ur 5ft4 and a guys 6ft thats the first thing u see from behind and its so irratating, cuz no I DONT WANT TO SEE UR BART SIMPSON BOXERS! SO PULL IT UP AND LEAVE IT UP!
Staying on the trouser tip, why do these 'fresh off da boat guys' wear trousers 12 times to big? and come with these phony american accents wen they've only just left da shores of the motherland? You dont have to buy trousers to tight, but damn dont buy trousers that we can both fit into 2GETHA!
Issue 3 sandels and jogging bottoms-nuff said.
Issue 4 Colours, now i personally dont have a problem with guys wearing purple and pink shirts like Cam'ron however dont make it a habit of wearing these colours all da time, or else i'll be wondering..'Is he bi-curious?'
Issue 5 (i have a lot of issues, dont i? well they need to be addressed) this one will be the last, PLEASE DO NOT WEAR A WINTER WHOLLY HAT AND A NEW ERA CAP..TOGETHER!

x-soul sista-x

What Easter Candy Are You??

Cadbury Creme Egg

You're the type that stole little brother's easter basket so that you could have MORE CANDY!

What Easter Candy Are You?

Have a fun and blessed Easter people!!

- AfroDivas

Can money buy you love?

On a discussion i was having with a male compadrez of mine, the topic came up if money can buy you love. I said no but he said yes, so being very lady-like i told him to explain what he meant first.
'Girls love everything materialistic...' he said.(at this point, before the conversation developed i was thinking is this boy serious?)...'if a guy has a lot of money he can buy anything he wants for a girl...'
I said: 'the only exception is love'
He said 'No it isnt cause, you can buy anything for a girl and they would eventually fall in love with you.'
His point was not getting no-where of any real interest, so i decided to state my case, instead:
'Money can buy you many things, cars, jewellery, e.t.c however the one thing in the world it cant but you is love, because love is something you can not see and purchase, you feel it. It is indescribable and has no price tag because love is priceless. There is a difference between being in love with someone and having love for someone but i cant buy anything for someone, in the hope to make them fall in love with me, it just doesnt make any sense!.
He said: Money CAN buy you love, especially with a girl you want if she sees that your going to spend on her, like she deserves to be spent on she WILL love you.
I literaly could not believe what i was hearing, so before i argued even more, i decided to ask him: 'Has money bought you love?' He was quiet. I said 'i take that as a no then, so what experience are you talking from' Again he was quiet. So i decided to get other peoples opinion on the subject.
Accordinbg to one guy, money cant buy you love it can give you a boost, money can make you look good and to a girl that is important cause they wouldnt want no bum on the street, someone who looks fresh is important. Well i think he missed the point.
Another guy said girls love to be in control, they love power. Money equals power so therefore money can buy you love.
These wild generalisations made me feel that most guys catergorized girls as being all the same and money hungry, which i disagree so i open it up to you can money buy you love?

x-soul sista-x

Remember X-Soul Sista-X.....well shes back from her looong hiatus *lol, and is no longer a "no strings girl" (thank the lord!!). Her outspoken and shocking posts will be on this site from now on....enjoy!

- AfroDivas

Back on the Scene..... continued

I’ve been gone for a while… but I’m back… bout to jump off… lol… (moment of madness) but anyway, the past few weeks have been ‘interesting’ to say the least, taking that break was much needed and added to my life experience. You know there are times when you think you’ve lived life but in retrospect you haven’t. See, I thought I had seen everything I had needed to see… I thought that I had experienced everything I needed to experience… but that all changed these past few weeks. You learn something new everyday and that’s exactly what has happened concerning my life… I’ve learnt a lot. With age comes wisdom…lol… check me though, talking about ‘wisdom’ but things have changed now, and in the next few weeks I’ll be telling you exactly why some things have changed.

My 1st week of my much needed break

I decided to go back to London, just to go and see friends and family… basically I went home to chill out. And that’s when everything started…. I was walking to my front door… (I think I had just come back from my friend’s house), not blowing my own horn but Gabrielle was looking FLY… so anyway I’m about to put my key in the door when someone calls my name. I turn around to see my next door neighbour, he’s such a cutie but let me give you some background info on him.

Tall, brown skin, very cute, very smart, very funny…. So basically I think he’s a HUNNY!! One problem – he’s younger than me. DAMN!! I mean I have never, ever been approached by a guy on ‘road’… and NO I’m not ugly that’s not the reason why I don’t get approached, I was told that some guys may feel intimidated by me but that’s another story.

Back to the scene, he calls me from his balcony then we start talking and whatever, catching up on things…. Then he tells me he’s coming downstairs I should wait. So I do. And what happened next is what surprised me the most…. He came downstairs and we were talking again, then he says, ‘You’re so beautiful’…. Lol…. Now if you know me I don’t take people's compliments seriously. I mean for all I know they could be lying to me and where would that leave my self-esteem if the truth was unveiled. Besides, I’m a diva… I don’t need anyone to tell me what I know already…. OK!!!! Lol. So he says ‘you’re so beautiful’… and his movements start to slow down…. then, then he leans in for a kiss .... now I don’t know about you ladies but opportunities like that don’t come knocking everyday… so what did I do?? Oh yes I do believe I kissed him back……

…. OK…. Calm down, calm down. I was joking…. It didn’t turn out quite as I described it but hey… no harm in dreaming right? So lemme rewind and start again,

Guy next door: You’re so beautiful
Gabrielle: Thanks. You’re not so bad yourself.
Guy next door: You know I’ve wanted to talk to you on a different level but as we went college together I knew you wouldn’t take me seriously so I decided to jam.

Now, there I am kinda dumbfounded… I mean this guy is a cutie and all those days we used to go to college together, all those times we used to mess about and stuff… he secretly liked me…. I would have never guessed.
He was right for not trying to approach me on a different level in college though because as some of you will know from your own experiences…. College is HYPE!! Everyone’s in your business, judging you, telling you what to do, or better yet telling their friends what they would have RATHER done if they were you.

Sad thing about ‘guy next door’ is he has so much potential… but Gabrielle is stuck in her own realm of insecurities and just won’t let it happen… shame huh? Age ain’t nothing but a number right…. yeah well tell that to my heart… ‘cos right about now it doesn’t even want to know.

Lesson 1: Something I remember Eva Longoria (Desperate Housewives) saying in ‘Elle’ magazine, she said, any guy that approaches you or asks you out on a date, you should give him a chance (this does not apply to ‘uncles’) because you never know what you’re missing out on. I mean take ‘guy next door’ as an example… he could be what I’ve been looking for all this time but I’ve missed that chance… now I’ll never know whether he was the one for me.

- Gabrielle

Honestly Speaking....

It’s a shame that we can’t be who we really are – all the time. Everyone wears a mask or a disguise of some kind, you almost have to. At work, you act a certain way, respond a certain way, talk a certain way; you have to project a work image – even if it’s totally not you. It’s all part of the job, no matter what you do for a living. Outside of work, when you’re with friends (for those who have friends), or when you’re just in a public place with other people, you act a different way. You’re a little more your real self, but you still have to wear a disguise.

There are rules. There are things you can’t say, shouldn’t say, shouldn’t do – no matter how right it feels. Feelings, feelings complicate everything. Most of the time you can get by, no matter what life decides to throw at you, but then those annoying feelings come marching in. They always arrive when you’re at your weakest or when you’re most distracted. It’s like they are always lurking, just waiting for a break in your defenses. There are good and bad feelings.
You would think that good feelings are always a good thing and bad feelings always bad, but this is not the case – especially when you’re feelings involve other people, and they almost always do.

There are times when good emotions have to be kept a secret because some people won’t understand and they will feel threatened and use your them against you. This is when good feelings can actually make you feel bad – because you can’t act on them or tell anyone about them. How many secrets can you keep before you go completely mad? In this world that's full of secrets how do people ever survive? How can we be prepared for anything when everything has to be such a secret? When you can’t admit your true feelings, are you lying? How can we be truthful about anything if we continue to lie about almost everything? Who is it we’re lying to – ourselves? If you truly dislike someone, but you’re nice to them and talk to them and maybe even do things with them, are lying to them? Your actions clearly say one thing, but on the inside, in that dark little place that only you know about, the truth lives.

Let’s say the opposite is true. You find yourself very attracted to someone, yet you distance yourself and maybe even avoid this person because showing any signs of affection toward this person is inappropriate for whatever reason. Yet if you disliked this person, it would be fine to have lunch, go for a walk in the park, engage in lengthy conversation – because – it’s all an act. You have no feelings for this person. It’s the guy down the street you really want to be with. All lies. If there is any hope in surviving in a world full of lies, we must tell the obvious truth, at least to certain people. The truth is that we don't have time to tell lies. We don't have time to stand still and weave these elaborate webs of deceit. We only have time to believe what is true. Believe that we will be okay. Believe that we will make it. To do otherwise is to live a constant lie and why even bother? What kind of life can be lived when you constantly have to watch your step, consider every word you say, control or deny your feelings so that no one will ever get a glimpse of what’s behind the mask.

How do you ever really know what’s true? How can you tell if someone really likes or dislikes you? How do you determine if someone feels the same way about you as you do about them when you can’t even tell that person how you really feel? In any relationship there are risks. If you do too much, you can scare the other person away. Do too little and they’ll think you’re not interested and go looking elsewhere. At what point do I remove the disguise, dig up your secret and tell someone your hearts desires? At what point can we all stop living a lie?

P.S. To the daily readers if this blog: excuse my randomness.....i just needed to vent!
To u kno who: You needed to read this!!

- SistaLova

What's Your Biggest Fear?

I know… I know! I apologise in advance…you can probably guess from the title that I'm not going to continue with my 'adventures' in this post … its just that this topic was a matter still fresh in my head, so I decided to write but I promise…. you readers have my word…. I am going to make sure my next post is about what I got up to in those 'exciting' weeks.

So anyway… what’s your biggest fear?

I asked a few friends of mine… just to get a varied answer of what people’s biggest fears were and even though I was looking for some sort of variation…. I actually got similarities.

Death... waking up to realise you’ve married the wrong person... failure, and so on and so forth. They basically fell into these categories: marriage, death, failure and regret. Asking people these questions made me realise that even though some of us have that ‘don’t care attitude’… we actually do care, 'cos if we didn't care, (personally I think) we wouldn't necessarily have a biggest fear (if you catch my drift).

My biggest fear…. I have loads…. Regretting important choices I’ve made concerning my career, my spouse… death…. Not making it into heaven (I don’t dwell on that one too much), I believe I’m going to heaven…. My last one is watching my younger siblings grow up and seeing them amount to nothing. Not that I concentrate on that but I don’t think I’d be strong enough to handle negative criticism from other members of the family (on behalf of my siblings) if you know what I mean.

I know you’re probably thinking where did that come from… but don’t you ever spend days thinking about different issues… wondering 'what if' or 'why' certain things happen. I actually have many days of ‘thinking’ and it bothers me that I think so much but hey… that’s another side of me. I’m a thinker… every situation I’m in or have been in… believe it or not… I’ve thought about it, maybe a bit too much, but I’ve thought about it. What I realised about being a ‘thinker’ is that you tend to plan things to the smallest detail and sometimes, just sometimes your plan doesn’t go to plan. Then what?

Then readers, you become an analyst, analysing every single thing, why it went wrong and what could happen if you got another chance. KMT. If only I could change this nature in myself… I seriously would. There are times when I want to live each day like it’s my last but to be honest that doesn’t happen and there’s me…. still being the ‘thinker’.
There are days when I have the ‘don’t care attitude’ but then it doesn’t last for too long… because as I said before, having that attitude actually means you do care.

Then I thought for a while and actually realised what my biggest fear was. I mean all the fears I listed are big... trust me. But if you couldn't establish (couldn't isolate) what you're biggest fear was, it's probably because you've deceived yourself into thinking you don't have one. And I'll be real honest with you... I know exactly what my biggest fear is and as lame as it may be... i think it's the root of most issues I come across.

My fear : disappointment.

I met him several times when I was younger... plenty more times as I grew older and frankly having to meet dissapointment again in the near future... puts me in some kind of fear. Some kind of apprehension that as time goes by... he gets uglier and uglier.

- Gabrielle

Back on the Scene

So I went on a break to live LIFE… writing everyday was stripping me from actually being able to let you guys know what was really going on in my life. So… what’s happened since my departure? A LOT!!! Oh my days!!! SOOOOOOO MUCH… so much I think it’s going to take a few days to fully complete the story.

So let me start at the beginning… relax, push your chair back and read on… my life… and its action.

Where do I start?? Umm… my quest for a husband is officially over!! How many times have I said that? I know, I know. LOADS. But this time I mean it and I’m not saying it because I’ve found THE ONE, in fact I don’t think I’m even near to him yet but I’ve realised something… I like to worry. I mean, I think I’ve picked up some of my mum’s traits and ‘worrying’ is on her list of characteristics. Honestly! To tell you the truth I have always been a worrier… to the point where if something is troubling me I won’t sleep, won’t eat, won’t even watch tv and if you know the type of person I am… when I don’t watch tv… there’s a problem. Some people find shopping therapeutic, others find that playing Pro Evolution sorts them out but with me its tv.

So, back to the story, it seems like every time I start talking to a guy, I’m infatuated then a few days later (1 week maximum) I’m off him. I was told by my friend that I have 'commitment issues' but I don’t think that’s it. Now I’ve decided to go on with life whichever way it sways me…. And boi… has it swayed me in some different directions. As my uni life became more exciting and I started to make new friends – I realised there was more to life than wondering whether a guy liked me or not … so now that I’ve got that guy issue out of the way I can commence to tell you about what really went down these past few weeks, and to tell you the truth I never knew I had it in me.

Read my next post… the first part into my much needed break.

- Gabrielle

Its Been A Long Time.....

Hey guys....I kno its been a while but i just needed a lil "time out" on the whole blogging thing. I love the idea of saying what I want when I want to....(not that I dont already). But the idea of afrodivas was to write about our lives and laugh whether it was good or bad, the truth is I wanted or needed to do a bit more living! Its all good now because the team is back!!

Ok... So i volunteered to write the first post back (kmt...Me & My eager self!), I didnt think it would be so hard. I even asked a friend of mine to give me a topic!! her response was, Whats the point in blogging?

So here it goes....

I used to wonder why people put personal stuff about themselves on the web. What if the wrong person were to find it and read it? But what is the likelihood of that ever happening? I mean, how big is the web? And unless I hand that wrong person the address of this website and reveal my identity on this site, how are they ever going to find it? So why bother? Well, that was the dilemma...but not anymore, everything said on this site is ALWAYS a true and honest expression of how I feel or felt at that time and there is no point in living in fear of what others think. (But I will admit sometimes I say things that I just know, peps are gonna have a problem with!)

I guess secretly I want the wrong people to find the site, because like I've said before some people cant handle the truth face to face. I love hearing about someone that I care about taking the time to actually try find this site and that they care enough about me to sit and read it. And then there are total strangers who stumble across it and take the time to comment.

I know I’m different ( I perfer the term individual..lol), I always have been I mean I can pass for normal or boring when I want to, but it takes effort...lol. What’s nice is when I post something and someone will say something like “I can relate to what you’re saying because I feel the same way", especially during our hiatus... big thanks to all da peps that left voice and text message(s) * notice I said messages...lets just say some of you are crazy...lol* asking us to come back...lol. Sometimes it’s just nice to see the number of visitors to our site even if no one says anything. But you know I enjoy the messages more!!

So maybe I’m doing this so I don’t let life get too crazy for me. And maybe I’m doing this just to get stuff out of my head. There will also be days when there’s no reason to spill words out on the screen except that writing is what I do and what I feel like doing at that moment, what I actually enjoy. I just write, like I was having a conversation with a total stranger on a long bus trip...not that I talk to strangers, I learnt that lesson in primary school lol!!
I am a humble person with some amazing things to say...lol and I guess the whole point of a blog for me is that I can just say it!

- SistaLova

Soon Come!!

Hey people....its been a while since the AfroDivas have been missing in action. But im pleased to say that we are returning on the 28th March!....so check us out a few changes have been made in the AfroDivas camp, so this blog will not have daily entries like before....but dont worry their will be regular updates and a few changes on the site. Peace....

- AfroDivas

To Be Continued.....

Wassup people, this is a final post from "da Afro Divas".....dont worry, we're coming back in a couple of weeks!
We have all enjoyed working on this site and hope to continue soon... bigger and better than before!

The date of our return has'nt been confirmed yet, so just watch this space!!....peace

- AfroDivas

Chirpsin d man dem (pt 2)

Ok... so I said I'm gonna start chirpsin d man dem and since then I haven't come across a guy that is worthy of me 'chirpsin'. Lol. Yeah that was up until I went to a little get 2 gether and there he was. The epitome of FINE. Oh my days!! He was beautiful man, the whole image. But see this chirpsin thing only works when you first see the person init, not if you've met them a couple of times.

I mean I know this guy but it's only recently that I noticed how nice he is. In other words my eyes opened WELL WELL! But see I just talk to him as a friend not a best friend, just someone I'm cool with. But to him I'm probably a young girl, he probably doesn't even 'see' me like that, that's why I want him to notice me. I mean I think we would actually be good together. So how do I go about it, how do I get him to notice me... cos that's what I want basically. I want him to like me. Is that a bad thing?

If he doesn't like me I'll move on. I know that for sure. It's not hard for me to like someone else(even my friends can tell you.... one of my good friends (her name Bushrat..lol..lol) calls me a 'crush hoe'), I can just 'like' one guy one day and watch another guy the next. But thats another story for another day.

Back to this 'beautiful' guy, what if he does like me... ah I can't stop thinking about him... I need to see him again. I wonder if this is how guys feel when they see 'the one' or a girl that they think is BUFF. I try to get him out of my mind but I can't, it kinda sucks 'cos I promised myself that I wouldn't focus on guys. But oh my days.......wot to do?? Someone help me 'cos the next time I see him I don't want to act a fool, I don't want to make it obvious to him that I like him but I reall want him to like me...

What do I do??

- Gabrielle

Sperm Bandits!!

I knew that heading would grab your attention...Honestly you lot are so predictable!! Any mention of sex and your eyes pop out of their sockets...lol
Well bad news peeps. Because this isnt about mine or anyone else's "Love Below"....well not entirely anyway...lol

If a woman gets pregnant by a man without his prior consent, is she secretly stealing his seed??

This thought came to me after reading an article about a guy suing a chick in New Mexico for stealing his sperm. He claims that she promised to take the pill, but stopped in order to have a baby.... making him a father without his knowledge or consent. The woman argued that she could not have "stolen" his sperm because because he "surrended any right of possesion...when he transferred it...during voluntary sexual intercourse". Now i dont know about you but i had to laugh when reading that particuilar line! she also said that "It should be considered a gift". I cant speak for all the women out there, but if a dude was to give you his sperm as a "gift" im not sure you would be happy about it...lol

We (men) can never be sure. There are all sorts of freaks around. If your a man, you have to deal with the possibility that you have released millions of "lil' Friends" into the wilderness. For all you know you could have fathered hundreds of kids...( i think the record no. of kids for a man was 888 by a old emperor of morocco)...that you know nothing about.

Whenever i try and discuss this topic with the opposite sex i always get the same reaction..."Excuse me, punk!....blaming mums for not using birth control....ever heard of a condom??"(you know while saying dat they were clicking their fingers or moving their neck so much it looked painful....lol)
Lets face it to some women, men are a walking gene pool, and its a general rule that a woman goes for the most sought after sperm she can lay her hands on. Its the right combination of brains, health and stamina...all of which i have! Once identified as the "best available", some women will zoom in like missile launcher!! I mean these women dont have a problem enticing us guys to give it up, all they have to do is wear lil' make up, get there hair done and wear the.... right clothes...
And if a woman can't get the "best", then she'll settle for second best, third best....A hard core woman will go even further. SPERM BANDITS

- BruthaDiva

Different opinions

Is it too much to ask to want to be successful, is it too much to ask to want to be independent, too much to want to live comfortably? I’m asking these questions because I feel like my independence poses a problem to the opposite sex. I mean at first, the guys I talk to seem to want that sort of girl but the more I talk to them the more they seem completely different to what I want in a guy. I mean at first its all gravy and then later on they’re talking about ‘the wife being in the kitchen’. OK. What’s wrong with you being in the kitchen? Don’t get me wrong, I will be a dutiful wife and I will look after my husband and our home but there is a limit to all of that. I mean what’s the point of me devoting my life to someone who won’t respect me enough to realise that not everything can be done solely by me. I think back to a conversation I had with one of my friends and he said that he will never step foot in the kitchen, like NEVER. I couldn’t understand how he could make a statement like that so I asked him to elaborate,

‘Basically, I don’t like cooking, don’t like being in the kitchen. I feel imprisoned anytime I go in there, so basically that would be my wife’s territory. Whatever I want, she makes.’

I’ve been told that I am quite shallow concerning some aspects of life but excuse me, what rubbish is that? So even if I was sick, this guy wouldn’t enter the kitchen. That is so wrong. And just hearing him talk about what his wife should do and what she should be about, well, frankly, it upset me. Something in me boiled up. I can’t do it. I can’t do that. I’ll love my husband unconditionally but I don’t know whether I could love a guy with such a character. It would be really hard, I do admit that. And then I was thinking about the flipside.

As much as that guy was chattin so much rubbish, have I ever been guilty of that. Umm... i think I have, not intentionally though. I mean you readers probably know me a bit by now... I seem shallow, not quite though, just a little. There have been a few things I have said in the past that could make a guy perceive ladies to be 'gold-diggers, shallow, egotistical, harsh.' But I mean come on what's the point in me being with a guy that I feel is doing worse than me in life. Not that I'm judging his way of life or anything... but reflecting to what I said before... I'm going to be a dutiful and submissive wife, but how can I do that if i don't even respect the guy. It's like if I'm the CEO of a business firm and my husband's the cleaner. It just doesn't work does it. And yes I know people say LOVE overcomes all of that but that sort of situation could present a lot of problems, don't you think??

Things like this are so confusing that's why I've decided to hang up my shoes of reasoning... I just can't be bothered any more. Next post ... I'm gonna be strait up... apologies in advance.

- Gabrielle

Say a lil' prayer

I want to ask my afro divas and other readers of this blog to say a small prayer to end all da madness dats been going on in da world, because i'm afraid my friend is gonna loose her mind!!

Truth is shes not really a friend but a collegue from work, every time she reads or hears a story about anthrax, mad cow disease or bird flu da girl goes into a panic and tries to track down whateva cure she thinks is available. She's so afraid of bird flu she nearly falls to the ground in da fetal position wheneva she sees a pigeon!!...lol

I should'nt even laugh, cos its serious....she keeps on advising everyone to wear gloves when opening their mail and drink soy milk because she's afraid of catching mad cow's disease from drinking cow's milk...kmt
I think all dis nonsense came from her trip to America...(u kno dey all crazy).

So remeba peps to say a lil' prayer!

- SistaLova

Not so Diva-esque!

Have you ever noticed when your phone stops ringing? Like I hope I’m not the only one but no one seems to call me anymore. And at first it didn’t bother me, but it’s like now I just sit at home doing nothing… and even through that I don’t get any calls. All I can think about is the amount of fun my friends are having, I don’t even like calling people at these times because it will add insult to my injury. Hearing your friend having fun with their friends. Nah… I’m not going to call. What’s happening to me? Gabrielle’s getting soft… I used to be tough, I used to be admired, my phone was always ringing, and I was always talking to someone. What’s happened? Have I crawled down my society circle? I hope not! I brought together my circle of friends… this can’t be happening. Just imagine if I was to call one of them, and they all happened to be together. Aargh…right now my life doesn’t seem so great. I haven’t even got any work to occupy myself with. Back in London and I feel like an absolute loser. This is not how I pictured it. I didn’t think I’d ever say this but I can’t wait to go back to uni. I’m being serious. And my uni. isn’t even the livest one… it’s actually quite boring when you eradicate the ‘raving, drinking,’ (not that I do that) but that’s all there is. And to me that is BORING!! How many raves can you go to in one week? Ok, ok, yes I know you can reach loads…but that’s really not me. But enough about that… what am I going to do about this ‘no calls’ thing. I mean I even check my phones (notice I said phones, no one calls me on either) to see whether there’s reception… now that’s sinking to an all time low don’t you think? Maybe this is the time when I’m supposed to focus on work and stuff but how can I do that? All my work is in… I finished everything. Oh my gosh!! I think I’ve fallen down my social circle.

Not so diva-esque as I thought huh.

- Gabrielle

Dont hate me, If ur girl wants me!!

In-se-cure (adjective) 1. Not secure or safe; 2. Not assured of safety; liable to suffer loss or harm
In-se-cu-ri-ty (noun) 1. The condition of being unsafe; liability to injury, loss or failure; uncertainty; instability

(I have wanted to talk about this particular subject for a very long time, but never really had a reason to bring it up until this morning. Since opportunity finally presented itself, I'm going to knock down there door. I want to talk about men, who are insecure in their relationships.)

A few weeks ago I got a call from a friend of mine that I haven't seen in over a year. She was calling to tell me that she was coming back down to London and was hoping we could get together for dinner one night while she was here. I told her that that was cool. For whatever reason, we never did hook up. What was even more strange, she didn't even call me to tell me what had happened. That was until this morning. She left me a V.msg and apologized for not meeting me. She said that her boyfriend ended up coming down too and he didn't want her to see me. She also went on to say that her boyfriend thought that we were too close and he didn't feel comfortable with our friendship. He isn't the first man that has unnecessarily felt uncomfortable with the relationship that I have with their girlfriend.

Unfortunately, none of these guy have anything to worry about. In most cases, I was there before they got into the picture and should be seen as a non-factor. For those cases where I met a woman who was already in a relationship, I would respect the guy and the relationship . . . at least as long as the woman did!

The way I see it, if you feel threatened by a third party, then maybe you need to check yourself. If you think for one second that the woman you're with is looking at someone else, then maybe, just maybe, you should see if there's something you aren't giving her... before you think the worst.

Have you ever been in a situation where you, or the person you were with, felt threatened by a third party? If so, how did you handle it? Were you ever in a situation in which you were forced to cut a friend out of your life for the sake of a relationship? If you've ever dated someone who was insecure, was it possible to reassure them that there was nothing to worry about, or did their insecurity ruin your relationship?

- BruthaDiva

Segregation

Segregation. What makes us segregate? Sitting in one of my seminars today actually made me think about that. As I looked around my seminar group I realised that even though we might not know it, we are segregated. Each row was separated into race, can you believe that? I mean I’m a strong believer of inter-racial relationships and I’m not talking about boyfriend-girlfriend relationships, I’m talking about plain friendships.

The 1st row was all Caucasians, the 2nd row was all Asians and the 3rd row were all black people. That disturbed me because I wondered what the subliminal message was behind the separation. I mean I genuinely like the people in my class so I don’t understand why our class wasn’t mixed up. I mean I don’t think we all sat in those places on purpose, but the fact is that we did sit there.

There are some things we do that we’re not aware of and segregation is one example. Usually my seminar group is mixed so that wasn’t my biggest worry. My worry was in my lectures; I haven’t seen segregation like this ever. My primary school was totally mixed, same goes for my secondary school, college was unbalanced but compared to other people I know, my classes were probably the only example of non-segregation. (Even though I think it’s due to the subjects I studied, I mean who takes French as an A2 Level). So basically through my life I haven’t seen segregation as I’ve seen it in uni. And what baffles me is what brings it on? I mean do people suddenly decide that when they go to uni they’re only going to talk to people who are exactly like them, by that I mean same colour, same origin, same background. Is that what my society has boiled down to? It saddens me but what can I do, I’m not the first to experience it and I doubt that I’ll be the last.

What happened to Martin Luther King’s speech, was it all said in vain? He wanted us to be able to walk side by side and no longer be segregated. But despite his efforts we still are. It might not be as extreme as it was back then, but the main fact is that we are separated. And that’s the problem. I can only imagine how it’s going to be for my children. You think its going to be worse? I hope not. I want my child to grow up with no inhibitions and no acquired stereotype of other cultures but in saying that I think that that might be inevitable. As the days go by and the years roll on, our society’s becoming more and more divided. And it’s that division that scares me.

- Gabrielle

Leave me alone!

Persistence is not the answer, you phoning me on a regular basis to remind me how much you love, miss and need me is not going to change my mind. Don’t get me wrong fellas, us women do appreciate some dedication but no is no. I recently broke up with an ex; someone who inspired my pen many a time, when it was good it was good but when it was bad it was real bad. I was his fool but not to worry because I soon woke up and saw everything for what it was, actually let me not sugar coat it and save face; I found out he was cheating and I was the other woman which is what spurred my wake up call. How I stayed blind for so long is another post altogether. But during our relationship I gave my all sometimes I received a decent enough morsel in return but most times I made do. In all honesty I don’t hold a grudge but my problem now is that I woke up but so did he and now he cant live with what his now missing out on. The phrases ‘You don’t know what you got till it’s gone’ is too real to be true! I have to ask myself why guys take their girls for granted then get pissed when their gone. You constantly telling me how sorry and wrong you are is not going to make me change my mind; I know you were wrong which is why I left and I know you’re sorry because I’m priceless and you don’t have me anymore. So to all the bugaboo ex’s out there persistent is not the key leave us alone! I know somewhere out there someone can relate.

Soul_Full

The Fabulous Life of Mama Drama

Yes! Welcome to the world of Mama Drama! You’re probably thinking ‘why does she call herself Mama Drama?’ Well ask anyone who knows me what one word can be used to describe me in a nutshell, they will most probably say drama…and I cannot even deny it one bit. My life (love life) is so dramatic, im telling you…if they made my love life into a motion picture I could win a few Oscars!

Ok to cut the long story short…over the last couple of months I have been on a quest to find myself the perfect man. But either they are good looking and crazy or they’re ugly and…well that’s it. So a couple of weeks ago I decided that I’d had enough of looking and I was gonna let my perfect man find me. Yeah right!!

So here was this guy Duane, who I used to talk to a couple of years ago but due to unforeseen circumstances we lost contact with each other. Fortunately, thanks to a helpful source, we found each other again. To tell you the truth I was so happy because in my heart I was thinking that it was too much of a coincidence that after all these years we would meet again. I really thought he was one of those guys who you talk to for a couple of weeks but after a few years you drift apart and you never see again. So just imagine how I felt when this guy wants to talk to me again. But was I in for a ride!!!

Ok so here I was talking to Duane who said all the right things to me and he was just the kind of guy that I’ve been dreaming about. He called me quite often, he texted me to see how I was and to let me know that he was thinking of me. He was so special!! But I suppose he got too excited. Now don’t get me wrong I no that when you meet someone new you want to make an effort but DAAAAMMMNN!!! How much of an effort do want to make.

Ok let me break it to you. We started to talk on a Tuesday and by the Thursday we were in a relationship (my mistake). He was calling me every 1-2 hours to see how I was. Take note…I tried to emphasise to him that I had 3 assignments to hand in and I needed space to do my work but no he continued to ring me… it got to the point where I had to turn off my phone for a couple of days. I was getting so stressed out. Then he wanted to come and see me…at first I was like ok but I really had a lot of work to do so I told him that it wouldn’t be ideal for me. A normal guy would be like “ok I’ll come and see you when you’re less busy, coz I want you to concentrate on your work.” In Duane’s world he says to me “ aww babes don’t worry when I come down I won’t bother you I’ll just bring the work I have to do…I can even help you with your work.” Take note im doing a degree in medicine and he’s doing a degree in music. So somebody please tell me what these two subjects have in common!!? Now he started to do the whole guilt trip thing. So he says to me “babes I just wanna see you, but I understand that you have so much work to do and I don’t want you to fail, I only want the best for you, you know I love you.”

Hold up a sec!! How can he say he loves me? We weren’t even together for a week, we haven’t even seen each other face to face . So how could he possibly love me?? He was infatuated not in love. Why do so many people get these feelings mixed up?

Mama Drama

A Msg RE: Da Lovas and Non-Lovas....

To all those happy and in love have a great day, if u aint found in love or found da "one" .....stil have a great day!!!

....much love and peace from da AfroDivas

Happy Valentines!!

What would you do??

Hey people its SistaLova, today's post is a bit different from my normal entries.....

What would you do if u caught your man/girl with someone else?...what would you do if you were the one that got caught??

This thought came to me after a incident that occured on radio, a friend sent me this a while back and i just had to give you lot a listen. Let me give you the background knowledge.....

A lady submitted her name and number to a daytime radio station in order to have them work with her to pull a holiday prank on her husband. The couple had been having issues, and she thought that a cute prank would add some much needed laughter to the relationship.

The radio station contacted her at work to let her know she had been chosen, and they immediately called her husband at home on air to pull the prank…the thing that really got me was his reaction
Take a listen…

Pranks do go wrong

The truth is i have no clue as to how i would act, words cannot even express the sheer embarrasment of it all...imagine all the friends and family that may have been listening. I really did feel for the girl but at the same time i couldnt help letting out a little snigger...(you know you did too!)

Remember to leave your reactions inside the comments box....peace

- SistaLova

Will You Marry Me?

“Will you marry me?” those words echo through my ear…is it me or is it getting hotter? I really want to answer him, but the words aren’t coming out, I’m really trying to say ‘yes’, but the more I try the more it gets harder to even utter a word. He’s been waiting for so long.... and before I know it... he’s gone. Got up and walked out on me. I guess he was tired of waiting.

And that’s when I wake up. That dream has been the same for the past week and frankly I’m starting to get scared. I really don’t understand why I’m having this dream now. I’m not seeing anybody…I’m VERY single! But as all those questions trouble me, one question that remains unanswered is why I can’t say ‘yes’.

The dream is unclear in the sense that I can’t see who the guy is but the feeling is that he’s my perfect guy. So all negatives aside, why can’t I accept his proposal. Why does it take me so long to comprehend what’s going on? Why do I feel so threatened by this dream?

I’m threatened because I just realised that my actions have repercussions. You ever heard, ‘what goes around comes around’, yeah well I believe that and in so much as I don’t think I’ve purposefully set out to break hearts, I think I’ve trampled on a few. Do you think it’ll come back to me in that way? I mean picture me… Gabrielle, finally finding someone I truly love, someone that I’ll give my heart to gladly, only to have MY HEART broken in the same way as I had done to others. That would be a worst case scenario wouldn’t it? But I’ve seen it happen. And love is not a respecter of person, so whether I like it or not, that ‘love bug’ is going to bite. What I am waiting for though is whether it bites me back... hard.

All those questions and no answers… I still don’t understand why I don’t say ‘yes’ in that dream, I mean I love all that sugary stuff… despite my harsh perception on ‘love’, I can’t wait to have my own happy ending. I’ve watched Best Man, Brown Sugar, Love and Basketball, Friday…ok maybe not Friday but you get my drift. I’ve fallen in love with ‘happy endings’ but it didn’t seem like that in the dream. I hesitated for so long you would’ve thought I had amnesia or something. The guy in my dream was waiting for what seemed like ‘years’ for my answer. And I was yet to give it to him before he walked off. What does that mean? Does it mean I’m afraid of commitment, does it mean that I’ll let the greatest thing that could ever happen to me just walk off, like the guy in my dream? What does it mean?

I’m trying to understand, I’m really trying to make my dream make sense and to no avail. The only thing I got from all this thinking was a headache…a really bad one at that which reminds me I think I need to get my glasses now…two years without wearing them isn’t good. No one wants to be wearing thick, like super thick lenses at the age of twenty; I am too cute for that.

- Gabrielle

There with me

As I look back over my life
As I look back at all my trials
I take a step back and realise
That as low as I've been
All the pain I've seen
Been part of the wrong scene
Now I know
As low as I may go
Some how God's love will show
Although I've been through the storm
And I've felt all alone
Now the pains gone
I can sassn wasn't by myself
All along there was someone else
Holding my hand through it all
God was there through it all

Life is a journey full of ups and downs, everyone's journey is different; some have more ups, some have more downs. As holy as we may all like to paint ourselves at our darkest moments God is usually the last person we turn to, we usually wait till we've made it through then realise that he was there.

Sometimes the pains so deep, it blocks everything out
I've learnt to look deeper, so I can see the way out
For every end, there's a new beginning
And every battle worth fighting ends with winning
For every darkness, there's a light
The power of love and hope can make wrong to right
When times are hard just keep heaven in mind
You can find heaven on earth just seek and find

The most important thing to remember is that where there's a will there's a way!
- Soul_Full

Mind your own!!

Why is it that some people CAN NOT, seem to mind their own business? But yet, if you say anything about THEIR business, oh my dayzz!
It's human nature to be nosy at times, seriously, everybody is curious about others. Some people just can't respect the boundaries.

DO NOT, hold anything you've done for me over my head. If you want to do something for me, just do it. Don't go expecting certain things or doing it so you can brag about it or hold it over my head. That completely takes away from the favor.
DO NOT, blab my business just because I trusted you enough to share it. I, personally, am not afraid to share my personal experiences, problems, embarrassing moments, etc, with the people I TRUST. This does not however, mean that I trust you to determine who else should know these things. If I didn't tell someone something......MAYBE IT WAS FOR A REASON!!!
DO NOT, lecture me on something based on my past. Don't discount that people can change, mature, and become more responsible as they age. Maybe two years ago I wasn't in the right place, maybe now I am. I'll never know if I don't try :)

As I re-read this post, I seemed to have been a bit angry as my fingers were typing. Strangely enough, I wasn't mad at all, quite the opposite actually.

-SistaLova

I asked for love, you gave me pain
I gave my all, your heart to gain
I forget everything, and gave you mine
Thought trust and love, could heal it over time
I asked to trust, you brought me lies
They call it love, all I got was trials
Sometimes I wish I never, asked for anything at all
Maaybe then, I wouldnt have to fall
In and out of love, with you
Never knowing if this love is true

Ever since I can remember I've asked myself as a woman 'Why do we do the things we do?'. Only us can hold onto something as obscure as a smile and stay in relationships we know we shouldnt even be reading about let alone be in. But this is far from the truthbecause as you read this somewhere some how another woman is doing the same thing, holding onto a relationship with the hope that one day it'll be what we want it to be, instead of just saying this isnt it and moving on, we stay until either us or the relationship run out of life, wither up and die. So I'm gonna ask everyone else (who's honest enough to admit) 'Why do we do the things we do?' (men too).

- Soul_Full

Moving a lil' too fast

My friend is having a little dilema and needed some advice, so i suggested asking the wise readers of this blog to help out.

Let me give you the background information.....right, my friend...lets call her "Katie", shes dating this guy called..."Tom" he's funny, considerate and that all that good stuff!
The problem is he moves "a lil' too fast", shes told him that she wants to take things slow and build a friendship before taking it any further.....he took this as a rejection and said "your just using what your ex-boyfriend did to you and taking it out on me......i would never treat you that way". Katie claims this is NOT the case, but still feels that she needs to protect herself in any relationship, this i understand.

According to her if it was up to him he would be moving in with her next month .... he is already talking about introducing her to his family, they have only been together for a few weeks! I have reminded her that she should be careful about what she wishes for....she always claimed she wanted a guy that was "worthy" of her and treated her the way she "deserved" to be treated.....then BANG here he is, and she wants to take things slowly.

They were shopping together and she introduced him to someone as her "friend" afterwards they got into an argument with him saying, and i quote...."im not your friend...i'm your man" she claimed she was in shock after this statement because she didnt realise they had established themselves as a "couple".
Katie's strictly "old skool" and she wanted your opinions...when do you know your in a relationship??

Katie: "does'nt someone have to ask??.....Katie, do you wanna go out with me?....Yes...No...Maybe?

Help my girl out and leave some comments.....peace

- SistaLova

My Ideal Man

My ideal man! The amount of times that I have thought about what my husband should look like or what I would like my husband to look like. And how easy it is to say ‘Morris Chestnut, Tyson Beckford, Boris Kodjoe, Shemar Moore.’ So easy because they are FINE!!! But realistically, what are the chances ey? I’m really going to make my way to work and bump into Taye Diggs. Oh how I wish! But I was thinking about my ideal guy and this is what I singled it down to.

A tall guy, preferably 6 foot tall but not essential, the guy just has to be taller than me (even when I wear heels). Baring in mind, I’m between 5’6 and 5’7. Next feature, chocolate complexion….that’s something that makes me weak….a nice sharp shape up. Oooh chale!!! That’s it right there. Lol!! You and I both know that there’s more……a nice smile and he has to be a Christian. Those are the fundamentals of my ideal man; you think that’s a lot to ask. Well, sometimes, I actually do. Guys that approach me fall far and in between but they are never quite there. And who do I think I am? I’m Gabrielle, and frankly I don’t care whether I sound conceited, I know I’m not, just trying to get my point across. There have been times where I’ve settled for second best, sometimes not even as good as second best, just cant help making the wrong choices. And now, I’m trying to raise the bar a little higher, maybe that way I can meet my match. Tall, dark and handsome.........I’m waiting.

- Gabrielle

The end of no strings attached??

An update from the x-SoulSista-x....show some love and leave a few comments!

Isn't it beautiful when break-ups are mature; take away all the name calling, taking back and animosity. Good friendship doesn't have to end just because everything else does, in everything there's a blessing.

Here we are again, but things have changed
Ain't no point in lying, they ain't the same
You've gone your way, and I've gone mine
It was bound to happen over time
All the good times, I won't forget
I'm forever grateful that we met
All the pain and hurt I won't hold against you
I'm grateful for what you put me through
Cause all the pain was a lesson learnt
You don't know the pain o fire til you get burnt
But don't worry, coz I can't hold no hate
It wasn't meant to be, call it fate
I don't think you see what you've done to me
But just give me time to be free
I'll always hold you in my heart
Its for the best that we part
You were my start, and my end
But I've grown up, lets not pretend

- Soul_Full

Honesty & Friends??

Wassup people, its BruthaDiva!.....

Firstly, forgive me for the slightly gay blog entry but this thought has been banging the walls of mind for awhile now...
There are very few people I call my friend, but how honest can a person really be with their friend? Is there really TRUE honesty? I’ve heard people say, “A true friend will run into a burning building for you!” “A true friend will tell you how they feel no matter what the circumstances” “A true friend will give you the shirt off their back …” yeah, right …
Let me begin with anyone who reads this post DON'T ask me if I’m talking about you because even if I am … I will deny it! Just know that this is a conversation in my head that I think many people can relate to.
“A true friend will run into a burning building for you!” -- I guess I’m not a true friend then because I do not run into burning building for anyone – if you run into a burning building for someone, you just might get BURNED!!
I mean, lets look at this situation seriously… a friend is in a heap of a mess, usually a heap they got themselves into, however, they listen to no one who attempts to tell them they are messing up, and suddenly they are in the "burning building" I decide, I ain’t running in! Does that not make me a true friend? Even though I have stretched myself across like a bridge and they refused to walk? This does not mean I won’t throw in a fire extinguisher, or call the fire brigade … but running in? I’ve ran into “burning buildings” before and got third degree burns for NOTHING.
“A true friend will tell you how they feel no matter what the circumstances” -- yeah....Do you know how many people I want to tell how I REALLY feel, but if I did they would go off? Even if they constantly say, “It’s important to always say how you feel to your friend.” For example, a friend of mine is in a relationship that I feel in my SOUL is chaotic, unbalanced, unhealthy and destructive. Whenever that person comes around he or she… drains every bit of my lasting spirit as I nearly taste blood, biting my tongue to not say how I feel.
You can’t tell your friends everything! Most people cannot take everything even if you say it in a nice way (you know --it’s not what you say it’s how you say it). When it comes to any of my relationships I can handle my friends telling me how they feel. I’m the type that needs some "insight". Most people are not like this and it saddens me to see people I care about being abused because they don’t want to be alone.
Dont get me wrong, I think most people would agree I am a loyal person. A friendship for me is about a sort of trade off… if I know you when you’re down and out, and you don’t know my name when I’m down and out, then there will be little giving. One might say, “Well that isn’t a true friend.” Not necessarily – I have friends that I love deeply, but I know they cannot have a conversation unless it revolves around them. I have friends that I care for to the bottom of my soul, but they only contact me when they need something. I have respected this is who they are and there is SOMETHING else about them that compensates. For me a friend is about having BOUNDARIES that need to be respected. Sometimes being a true friend is knowing when to shut the f**k up! Knowing when not to run into that building! Knowing when to say NO!

x-soulsista-x back!!

More talk from the soul chick!!

Sprung

Everyone remembers their first time, I'm not even talking about your actual first time, I'm talking about the first time someone made you feel like you were sex appeal.com. Just by the way they talked to you or touched you, they made you feel like you were God's gift to them, making you want to share all of you with them.

As you hold me, I can feel your heat
The power we hold, when we meet
Your warm arms hold me tight
I forget all wrong, coz this feels right
As our lips touch I hold back the lust
Coz to be with you, near you is a must
With our lips together never to part
I feel the beating of my heart
Telling me, this is what we longed for
Holding us together just a little bit more
I hold you tighter as ours lips part
Coz we both know it's only the start
I lay my head down on your chest
In this place I could forever nest
As you hold me tighter, I need more
And I know you feel the same for sure
Your hands trace around my body
I guide you, to let you know I'm ready

- Soul_Full

All because of a new laptop!!

Today i was out looking for a new laptop because my other one is always playing up. So im in PC World and this guy approaches me trying to chat the weakest lyrics i have ever heard.
You know what bothers me...he had used these lines before. I know this because there was an air of confidence in his approach, as if this crap had worked for him before. Now there are some dumbass chicks that will think that nonsense was cute.
He walked by me a couple of times, trying to get a good look at my "goodies". When he did stop this is how the conversation went;

Weak_lyrics: Excuse me miss, whats your name? (singing it just like Pharell Williams!)
SistaLova: erm.....hi (oh my days! give me strength)
Weak_lyrics: What are you doing?
SistaLova: (Stupid question....but he's making small talk, i'll ignore it.) I'm looking for a laptop.
Weak_lyrics: So what are you doing later?
SistaLova: Nothing really. Why do you ask? (playing dumb)
Weak_lyrics: So do you want to come with me?
SistaLova: (Baffled by the question) Excuse me!!
Weak_lyrics: sorry, i have a doctors appointment later and....
SistaLova: ....and you want me to join you??
Weak_lyrics: *laugh* nah....i'm going home before then. You wanna come home with me?
SistaLova: *big laugh* look little man, i dont even know your name!!
Weak_lyrics: It's Michael....so you wanna come with me?
SistaLova: *bigger laugh* NO!!....kmt

Can you believe this punk actually got offended and said "fine then"....WTF!!!! are you serious? go home with you?? do i look like a stray puppy or a hoe....come home with you i should give you a backhand for even asking....please!
But all was not wasted....i did get a good deal on a laptop. *mumbling* come home with you....

- SistaLova

Chirpsin d man dem

I'm looking to start approaching guys.. .on a serious note. Because i know as soon as I said 'I'm looking to start approaching guys', a few of you were already laughing. I'm just tired of seeing a nice guy walk past me (having made the necessary eye contact with him) and there still be no result. I'm tired! Gabrielle's looking to change the world around and I'm gonna start by influencing others. I can't wait around for opportunity to knock on my door. No, i'm gonna drag opportunity to my door by her hair. Trust!!

Now I've been considering how this new approach could work....'cos to tell you the truth...some of you guys are lacking.. seriously!! All I have to say to you is 'hi' or walk past you and smile...and you guys just get too excited. Too too excited.

Typical conversation. Let me set the scene: -

Ray and Jerome are walking down the road, catching joke as usual...just being the regular guys that they are. Now, imagine me, Gabrielle, a self-proclaimed diva, (looking diva-esque if I say so myself) walking past them. Oh, you know their heads are going to turn! So, anyway back to the scene.

They watch me HARD, and i mean HARD, as if to say I'm wearing their boxers or something. So instead of being rude, 'stush' (if you prefer) like some other girls are, I decide to smile. BIG MISTAKE!!

Ray: Rah Jerome....do you know that girl?

Jerome: Nah! I dont u know.......why??

Ray: I think she's on you bruv.....she's bang on your ends lyk!! Did you not see the way she smiled at you. Nah bruv...that girl's serious. She was OVA watching you. Gotta rate you bruv...you still got the girls going wild.

You see what I'm saying. And there's me just trying to be polite...now if I did like that guy I would make it blatantly obvious...dont get it twisted, a smile can mean anything. It could mean 'hey, im just being friendly', it could mean 'rah i think i should just smile at you to make you feel better about yourself....cos i'd be bugged if I looked like you'.

A smile can mean anything.....but a straight up conversation where a girl's telling you that she likes you....now that's what I'm talking about. But see the suspense lies there, could I be saying that I like you...as a platonic kind of 'like' or could i be saying 'i like you....i want to take things further.'

I guess it all depends on what kind of person you are......

Lemme know what YOU think.

Does Hip Hop hate women??......

I love Hip Hop....
For many reasons, one being because it is one of the few genres of music to be retained by the minorities that created it in the first place. For all its faults and misconceptions it has always been a voice or expression for those who struggled or overcame certain oppressions. Now I don't want to go on about the hardships of having brown skin and having a vagina, because I enjoy both immensely....
But it occurred to me after a discussion with BruthaDiva on certain Hip Hop artists' albums such as Snoop Dogg's "R&G....Rhythm and Gangsta..the Masterpiece" that Hip Hop promotes degrading women with songs like "Can You Control Ya Hoe" and lines like, "Bitches Ain't Shit anyway".
On a certain level I have to laugh, because when music like this is playing at a party guess who's dancing the most......women. Sometimes even singing along to the words!... (even i am guilty of dancing along with those tunes).
Its not just the lyrics but the music videos too, showing girls "shakin dat ass!" It also occurred to me that most girls who agree that hip hop degrades women are just as bad, because you know you watch the videos and try and master the moves...lol
Dont get it twisted, Hip Hop is not all about calling women "bitches" and "hoes" and there are few tracks that i could name that show repect to women. Its just funny that some girls dont mind what a guy calls them.

Anyway...i have a feeling that a few people are gonna have a problem with what i've said today...lol, so leave a comment....peace

- SistaLova

I Miss You

I miss you with a special part of my heart
But my head knows we’re better apart
You’re like the poison of my eye
And either way I feel like I’ll die
A life without you makes me feel alone
But when you’re here I wish you were gone
They say love blossoms like a flower
Then my weed killer has no power
For everyday is a struggle to forget
The happy times linger yet
The pain I can’t seem to remember
Although the fear stays to linger
Afraid, cause I’ll know you’ll hurt me
But I still want you here to hold me
Wise, cause I keep everything inside
My feelings are the start of my own demise
For you my feelings I can’t deny
But my heart I can’t supply

- Soul_Full

Right peps...its been a while since the last post. But i promise you wont be disappointed, Soul_Full is sharing some soulful poetry that we can all relate to. Leave a few comments...peace

x-soulsista-x is in da house!!!

Remember to leave your honest opinions in her comment box.

People make me laugh!!

Imagine! Insult upon injury! The latest craze HI 5. So like everybody else I know, I’m hooked. Well, its died down since I left university but you can imagine just how hooked I was on the site. People make me laugh….some ugly, some cute…some shouldn’t even be displaying their pictures at all. One instance I was on the computer in the early hours of the morning and you know that’s the time when your eyes start to slowly close. Despite signs of my body shutting down I continued to look at people’s profiles and I clicked onto this certain person’s picture, and let’s just say I stayed awake for the whole night, for fear of ever having to see that picture again. As soon as I saw that picture, my fingers started fumbling around on the keyboard, praying intensely to get out of that page. WOW!! I prayed for a good 20 minutes asking God to bless me with children that I could look at everyday with both eyes open. You know those ‘you’re so ugly’ jokes….well I don’t think they would be suited to the person that I saw, it should be changed to ‘why, oh why did your mum even bother’. And the sad thing about it is that I can guarantee you that the person was probably quite attractive when they were younger, but the ‘wonders’ of the world got to them. Bare bleach and make-up does not equal beauty ladies!! That’s all I can say about that.

But that’s not even why I’m writing about this, so anyway, I’m looking at new messages that I may have, and I have quite a few, so I’m smiling (smiling because HI 5 has reunited me with many old friends) and I see messages from a few guys that I just cant seem to remember. I automatically read the messages as you do, and I know why I couldn’t remember any of the guys. I couldn’t remember them because they’re all looking to get a green card. Can you imagine? Insult upon injury. And do they all go to the same school of chat up lines, SERIOUSLY? It baffles me, message after message,

‘Hey baby, how u doing? U know I saw ur pic and jus had 2 msg u, cos ur soooo fine. Baby I wanna marry u, I wanna make u mine. U think it wud be possible 4 us to meet up sumtime, I wud really like to get to know u’

Now just imagine the accent. Right! So I’ll stop there before I start to write things that I don’t really mean. The drive behind some people just truly amazes me. Enough said.

- Gabrielle

A Sucker For Love

Todays blog is discussing a query of mine that i'm hoping you can help a sista out on! So leave your opinion in the comments section.
Right...where do I start....ok, my first... love?? a.k.a the cause of my heart break a.k.a Mr Smalls because if I remember right he was anything but!!
Hmm...even thinking about him still makes me smile...sort of (and before you say it YES SistaLova is a sucker for love, hence the name). Anyway the best way to describe the relationship I had with Mr Small it would be a pleasing kind of sickness if such a thing exists. I mean to say when you've experienced an exciting and eventful moment in your life your sad to see it end but still grateful that it happened. when I first met Mr Small, it was far from a perfect impression.
Now, most girls will not admit this but I will. When I see a guy the first things I look for are physical attraction and a suitable dress sense, not if he has a good personality!! Dont get me wrong that is very important, but you cant see good personality (I mean if I could, I would be able to see that he was a self- righteous and abusive twat!).

*May I just say that looking at a person's appearance and creating a first impression does not make me materialistic...it makes me honest!*

Anyway where was I....right, my first encounter with Mr Small. Its not that he was'nt attractive, he just rubbed me up the wrong way, at first I thought he was joke. I mean he thought soo much of himself, as if he was a gift sent straight from the heavens to bless the opposite sex!....pls!
But somehow he managed to convinced me that this was the case and that I should appreciate his interest in me. I was young and naive at the start of our relationship and I have said before I did'nt truly love or respect myself. Looking back the whole thing was like an episode of Eastenders.....alot of drama!
Now the thing that caused me confusion was that at the beginning and even towards the end him and I would be sooo happy and throughout this I found myself becoming more emotionally dependant on him, which was stupid of me because he never really seemed interested in what emotions I was feeling to begin with! but other times it was as if he was a completely different person.
Those closest to me could see how unhappy I was becoming, but to everyone else I gave this pretense of happiness and "being in love", which I was....at first!
Even when I found out about the other girls... (Yes there were other women), I believed in his lies and felt only he could love me I still stayed with him. This is funny because before him, I used to think girls who stayed with their "wrong" men were stupid and if they were willing to accept such behaviour they deserved it.....then here I was doing the same thing!
After that experience it would be easy to say I hated him and all men. But I refused to allow it to stop any possible "true" love from entering my life and it also taught me alot about myself.
I may of mentioned this before, but recently I bumped into Mr Small and said a few words...he apoligised for his previous lack of respect for me and claimed he "always loved me". Now, I am passed the point of ever wanting a relationship with him again.... but my question is
Can a person ever really change?

-SistaLova

x-Soulsista-x has another post for you, enjoy!

Reminisce...

Have you ever reminisced on all the guys that you used to like back in your young days. Ever wondered what could’ve happened between you and that cute guy/girl that lived on your road, or ever wondered whether you and that good looking guy would’ve still been together if it hadn’t been that he cheated on you with your best friend. OK….. That’s a Jerry Springer moment right there…..but you get my drift. I just couldn’t help myself thinking about all the guys that I liked in my past………and the funny thing is that I remember all their names. Every single one………even if I only liked them for a week. Going in order from my 1st crush to now, I could probably go through the alphabet and name at least one guy that I’ve liked.


But have you ever thought about those people and wondered what kind of relationship you could’ve had with that person. There are some days I wish I bumped into them and could just see how they had turned out……….I do see some of them now actually and can only laugh on how easily I could fall in ‘like’ with someone. Lol. I’m laughing now because during my last year at college I became a serial ‘liker’, I think I must’ve liked nearly every guy in my year at least once, and not only them but guys at church, guys that I knew from my past, guys that lived in my area, a real random selection. My love life has been very amusing, amusing because there hasn’t been any love in those equations at all. No love whatsoever. And as much as I would like to have experienced love in my past, I haven’t, and as much as I would like to be ‘in love’ now, I have to be very truthful with myself, I’m just not ready.

As pathetic an excuse that may seem to you…..I feel that at this moment ‘I’m just not ready’ is the best way to describe how I feel about relationships. I’m just not ready. Basically, words can’t explain how I feel exactly but all I know is that when I’m ready to be in a relationship I will know. I’ve taken too many chances, too many stabs in the dark at trying to find out whether I can commit or not. Frankly, right now I can’t commit. Simply because I feel that commitment from me is too much to ask.

Commitment means responsibility – something that takes up time or energy, especially an obligation. And it can also mean devotion or dedication, for example to a cause, person or relationship. I just don’t think I can owe a person a certain amount of responsibility right now, I just can’t. I want to one day, don’t ever get it twisted. Being able to have someone else that relies on you, like you’re their own self, their own body, that’s something special. And I feel that in my future I’ll be able to do that, but as for now. Cant do it, sorry.

- Gabrielle

Introducing BruthaDiva?

Yeah! you read it right, it wasnt your eyez decieving you.. I am da BruthaDiva, I got tired of reading all da oestrogen intensifyed, unbalanced and biased reports on us bruthas. So I got da hook up from my AfroDivas to write (as best I can) an honest, inciteful expression of the male mind...lol pls. Me inciteful! anywayz I was trying to think of a topic dat would interest da masses. Then I realised I dont care if u like what I say because i'm gonna say it anyway!
Right about now you probably think i'm a cocky, arrogant and sexist guy. Well....your right! and I make no excuses for that. This blog is all about telling da truth right?
Ok...Why do black girls have sooo much attitude? (do u like da way i dropped dat, yeah me too!) Now before all da girls reading this go crazy, and start cursing at their computer monitors I dont mean all black girls I just mean most...lol
No seriously...I love women especially black women, I was raised by one. I love their inner strength and heavenly bodies! But sometimes you sista's are too much!
...let me use an example; I was at a party not too long ago. Looking "fresh to def!" as always and da music was great. Everyone seemed to be having a good time. Across da dancefloor i see a very attractive lady. So I proceeded to approach her, putting my swagger on. Then I politely asked her for a dance. (Noticed I asked her and did'nt grab her from behind like some other brutha's do!) she looked me up and down as if I was suspected terrorist! kmt....then she said "no, not right now" but from da tone of her voice, what she really meant was "no, and don't look to dance with me later".
Someone explain to me how this could happen!! I mean i'm a good looking guy, confident, have a job and I treat ladies with respect (I had to highlight ladies, cos' some ain't!).
What does a good brutha have to do for you??

All right guys! click this to read another member of da afro divas x-Soulsista-x she has very "interesting" diary entry.
Leave your thoughts in the comments section.

This is MY TIME!!

A day in the life of this afro diva. Hi! My name’s Gabrielle, a self proclaimed diva! Yes, you saw it right, I said diva. Urgh... here we go, another feminist!! And what’s wrong with me calling myself that (calling myself a diva I mean). It’s about time I think. I’m fed up of being the nice girl….so similar to the other divas in this log…. I’m outspoken, I’ll say what’s on my mind, exactly when it’s on my mind. And don’t assume that I’m just bitter….because really I’m not. No really. I’m not bitter neither am I shallow but let me give you a little background on ME.

Life really started with me being quite naive….trusted everybody, loved everybody, tried to please everybody and lived my life for everybody…..that doesn’t sound right, does it? Well…. that’s because it wasn’t, and that’s how I lived my life. You can only imagine the emotions I felt inside….I felt like I was being fake and I felt like people around me were liking someone else and not really liking me. So, as soon as I finished secondary school, the mask came off. I became the realest Gabrielle anyone could ever know. Now, I tell you how it is whether you like it or not. Simple! So if you have a dilemma, or a little situation, don’t let your worries get the best of you…no, no, no. Just let me know your dilemma and I’m sure I’ll make you see sense.

So as I continue to talk about my life….you should get to know me and my short comings, I am in no way perfect. I’m not bitter as I said before…but be warned….there are times when I cant control what comes out of this mouth. My apologies in advance.

So…….. i know its a bit late but i just thought you guys needed a little taster into what i spend my time thinking about......and this is how i was feeling during Christmas. It was the 19th December….five whole days before Christmas, and boi did i have a lot to say!!! Enjoy!

Its Christmas!! And who gives two hoots. Not me. No, for real! I couldn’t care less if it was Easter, Valentines Day, or whatever other holiday there is. Here we go……I hear you say. But not really, see this is how I see Christmas….year after year of the same routine….the number of presents you receive starts to decrease, half the time you’re asleep on that day anyway….and it just starts to get boring. Well, that might just apply to me…..it just seems so overrated…I mean whose birthday are we celebrating….yeah exactly…some people don’t even know. So I just see it as an excuse for a holiday for some people, a time when the world can rest and we have an excuse not to work, I mean those who don’t even believe in Jesus participate. Lol. I can be so cold sometimes.

So today I watched KING KONG…. Yes I know, I know. I had so many stereotypes about that film….I mean KING KONG….a film about a giant ape. Oh great! How much fun!!! But I was pressured into going….so I took my younger brother along to watch this film and lets just say…..I have not watched a film showcase love in that way. Can you imagine loving someone….loving someone so much that you wouldn’t think twice about dying for them. Well that’s what this ape did for a woman; it did this for a woman that it couldn’t even communicate with. I just saw so much love in that film….and when I left so many things were brimming in my head. Yes King Kong is fiction, I know, but I haven’t seen love displayed like that before…and I thought how beautiful it would be if a guy displayed that sort of love for his girl. But some of you are thinking…some guys do show their girls bare love. Ok. I know that…..but why does it take an arm, a leg and a threat to damage a guy’s manhood, for a girl to find out exactly how much a guy cares for her. That’s not right, is it? No. Not at all. And the next few days are going to detail my quest into why guys don’t let a girl know how they feel….well before its too late anyway. So I suggest you keep that in mind….guys if you have an answer to that, leave me a comment…addressed to Gabrielle. Same goes for the ladies reading this….if you know the answer to that question leave me a comment too.

Let's see how both sexes feel about each other's display of affection.

Gabrielle