We've all been there. You're out, and you see somebody who catches your eye for whatever reason. Maybe its their eyes. Or maybe it's their hair. Or maybe they just have that "thing" that Lauryn Hill was talking about that.
Whatever it is, you become helpless to your impulses and your forced to just go over and speak. Everything is going well. Your "hello" was well received and a purposeful conversation was begun.
And then...
...that idiot says the dumbest thing you've ever heard in your life. Yes, in just a few short minutes, it is possible to meet somebody who goes from being hot to trot, to well...not.
Im sure its happening right now as you read this.
And yes, it can happen to you. So being the fly butha i am, I feel the best way to prevent this problem is to offer a few situations that can make you less than hot to the opposite sex in 10 minutes or less.
1. Come off like you are a egotistical little shit.
Have you ever meet somebody and they made it seem like you were lucky to even get the opportunity to do so? (I know alot of you are nodding your heads). I know a woman who assumes that anytime a man speaks to her, he is trying to spit lyrics. ANYTIME. What I find funny about it is that she's not attractive...in the first place. So she will blast nearly any man who even offers her so much as a compliment and assume that he is just spitting more lyrics than Twista.
Word to the wise, self-esteem is really important. What's also important is realizing that if you have an 8 body and a 5 face, you are a 6.
2. Have breath that is Hotter than a summer in West Africa
Yes, halitosis is a real thing. I'm not even sure there needs to be an explanation here. Let's just say, if nobody wants to talk to you and you look like Halle Berry, either you have a sign on your forehad that says "SARS lives here" or you're breath is beyond reproach.
3. Just being plain...dumb.
I don't know about you, but I HATE dumb chicks. With the passion of Mel Gibson. I know some people who like dumb chicks because they are easy but that to me its the ultimate turnoff. If I see a fine woman who gets so excited because she just discovered that there are pens that if you push the button, the ball point comes out...well, she will become very unattractive quickly to me. Dumb girls cannot be fine. It is mentally impossible for me to find dumb women attractive. I would assume that women would feel the same about men.
4. The Standards
What are the standards? You know, blatant things like picking your nose, farting, or any of the other bodily functions one should reserve for private time. I know a chick who will burp, and then tell you about it. Needless to say, not very attractive.
5. Being clumsy
You know, nothing is worse than being the embodiment of this statement: oh, he's fine, but...
Or. Bruv, she's fine but...
Anytime you have a but... attached, you just aren't ranking high enough. And just being really clumsy from jump will do it unfortunately. If you spill my drink on me I'm going to not only wonder how in the hell you made that happen seeing as it was my drink, but i'm gonna be pissed. It's hard to see attractiveness when pissedness (i know its not a real word) comes into force.
Unless you're just that fine where it doesn't matter. Which is possible. Trust me.
6. Wear more makeup than that clown from the simpsons.
Maybe this is just a personal thing. I don't mind makeup. But I do mind additional faces created by too much makeup. And maybe I couldn't tell that from afar. Upon closer inspection, you can become very unattractive if I'm not sure if your face really belongs to you or not. Nothing is scarier than possibly waking up next to a Gremlin.
7. Have the ugliest walk known to man.
This an entire other post, but an ugly walk, will totally fuck up your attractiveness. If you walk like you never quite learned how to do it, well, you're gonna be busted. Like I said, that's another post.
These are but a few ways to become unfly in 10 minutes or less. Don't let it be you.
Unless of course you're already busted in which case, it doesn't matter and you can proceed as normal.
- BruthaDiva
Wednesday, May 31, 2006
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
I Saw This And Thought Of You...
I know we havent posted in a while...truth is there aint been anything important to mention. But a friend sent me this and you lot know how i like to share!!
- SistaLova
Monday, May 22, 2006
We Do Exist!!
I've been sitting on this one for a while, looking for the ideal time to post it. Not to say its the right time now but i know some of you have been missing me. Unfortunately, I can't take credit for it, it was e-mailed to me at a time when I needed to read it.
It's an open letter addressed to women letting them know that there are good black men out there. I'd like to think that I am a good black man and hope someone out there will co-sign that for me. All the media shows is the drug dealers/users and the men that degrade women. The only black men you see on the news, or in the papers are the murderers, convicts, rapist or the athletes on the back page. It's is rare that you see a positive image of a black man on television. I for one think that everyone needs to stop glorifying the bad and start uplifting the good. Then again, I am just one man. I hope this post reminds you of at least one person in your life, and if it does, feel free to tell us about him so everyone can know that we do exist!
Everyone receiving this either:
1. Is a good black man
2. Has a good black man
3. Will be blessed with a good black man soon
4. Has met a Good Black Man; but failed to recognise him.
Good Black Men are indeed all around us. We pass them on the streets, in the shops and the halls at work. Most we can't see because we don't know what a good man really looks like. He usually isn't flashy enough, or rich enough to turn our heads. He might not wear a suit or push a Lexus. He might not have "a body like Tyson with a Denzel face". But, as you mature; you realize it's better to find someone who's got your back rather than someone who turns your head.
A good man doesn't agree wholeheartedly with everything you say. He doesn't just tell you what you want to hear and do the opposite. He doesn't declare how sensitive, sweet, caring, sincere, blah, blah he is (He won't have to because it shows). He has his own opinions and yours may clash, but he doesn't have to degrade you to prove he's right. He even admits at times to being wrong, especially if you are willing to do the same.
A good man is not going to meet every item on your checklist. He is human with frailties and faults mixed in with all of his wonderful, strong attributes. He needs your love and respect.
~~~~~~~~~~He needs to feel that you don't live to catch him doing something wrong so you can declare, Aha! I knew you were a dog!!
A good man isn't insecure about his women having great achievements. In fact he is her number one supporter and becomes disappointed with her when she begins to lose herself, for the sake of not hurting his feelings, or just want to make him happy. His happiness comes with seeing her excel in her dreams and accomplishing her goals. For as she excels and is exalted, a good woman will bring her good man right along with her. A good man doesn't necessarily give you a huge birthday or Valentine's gift. He shows his love in the ways that are comfortable to him.
Don't judge him by TV standards. No one is really living a fairy-tale. You'll miss out on your own fairy tale by buying into the myth that our men are no good. It's Just not true. Black Men, we salute you, and thank you for who you are and all you've done.
- BruthaDiva
It's an open letter addressed to women letting them know that there are good black men out there. I'd like to think that I am a good black man and hope someone out there will co-sign that for me. All the media shows is the drug dealers/users and the men that degrade women. The only black men you see on the news, or in the papers are the murderers, convicts, rapist or the athletes on the back page. It's is rare that you see a positive image of a black man on television. I for one think that everyone needs to stop glorifying the bad and start uplifting the good. Then again, I am just one man. I hope this post reminds you of at least one person in your life, and if it does, feel free to tell us about him so everyone can know that we do exist!
Everyone receiving this either:
1. Is a good black man
2. Has a good black man
3. Will be blessed with a good black man soon
4. Has met a Good Black Man; but failed to recognise him.
Good Black Men are indeed all around us. We pass them on the streets, in the shops and the halls at work. Most we can't see because we don't know what a good man really looks like. He usually isn't flashy enough, or rich enough to turn our heads. He might not wear a suit or push a Lexus. He might not have "a body like Tyson with a Denzel face". But, as you mature; you realize it's better to find someone who's got your back rather than someone who turns your head.
A good man doesn't agree wholeheartedly with everything you say. He doesn't just tell you what you want to hear and do the opposite. He doesn't declare how sensitive, sweet, caring, sincere, blah, blah he is (He won't have to because it shows). He has his own opinions and yours may clash, but he doesn't have to degrade you to prove he's right. He even admits at times to being wrong, especially if you are willing to do the same.
A good man is not going to meet every item on your checklist. He is human with frailties and faults mixed in with all of his wonderful, strong attributes. He needs your love and respect.
~~~~~~~~~~He needs to feel that you don't live to catch him doing something wrong so you can declare, Aha! I knew you were a dog!!
A good man isn't insecure about his women having great achievements. In fact he is her number one supporter and becomes disappointed with her when she begins to lose herself, for the sake of not hurting his feelings, or just want to make him happy. His happiness comes with seeing her excel in her dreams and accomplishing her goals. For as she excels and is exalted, a good woman will bring her good man right along with her. A good man doesn't necessarily give you a huge birthday or Valentine's gift. He shows his love in the ways that are comfortable to him.
Don't judge him by TV standards. No one is really living a fairy-tale. You'll miss out on your own fairy tale by buying into the myth that our men are no good. It's Just not true. Black Men, we salute you, and thank you for who you are and all you've done.
- BruthaDiva
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
The Latest
Even though my name is 'crush hoe', I've only REALLY liked a few guys in my lifetime. SCOUT'S HONOUR! (even though I was never a scout).
So now - this guy I'm talking to, rightly named 'my first love' is my mind's focus at this moment in time. I can't believe that I still like him after so long, I mean I had a little crush on him when I was younger but as I said 'it was a crush', I would've expected to get over it by now - but I still like him.
The story is that I hadn't seen him in YEARS but it was only recently that we got back in contact with each other. So we talked on the phone for a few months and arranged a few dates but every single one fell through, (both our faults really). Now, I'm supposed to meet him and all I can say is 'WHATEVER'
I KNOW!!! After all that and I don't even care anymore, I really can't be bothered. It kinda gets to me that I'm not excited but then again I think I have reason not to be. Failed dates, when we talk there isn't much conversation, the fact that I still haven't seen him, I don't think you can blame me for not being excited. And despite all that I've said, I know exactly why I don't want to be excited - I might meet him and find out that I actually don't like him. That would crush me, it really would. Imagine me, liking him all this time, secretly hoping that he might be the ONE, only to find out that 'WE' could never happen. It would crush me.... and my mum. LOL. My mum absolutely adores him, come to think of it - so does my DAD. But I won't know anything 'til the end of this week - and I'm apprehensive. Apprehensive because next week could be the start of a new sector in my life. I might no longer be a 'crush hoe' - Gabrielle might actually settle down.
'YEAH RIGHT', I hear you say, but it could happen. NEVER SAY NEVER.
Oh yeah - what do I wear? I want to look nice but don't want to come off as desperate. Oh my!! Gabrielle actually cares what people think this time ( I must really like him). I want him to at least see an improvement in me since the last time he saw me - party dress and hairband to match. MEMORIES!!!
- Gabrielle
P.P.S my laptops gone until after exams so I might not be posting until I get some other computer access so if I don't write for a while, you know why!! KISSES x x x
So now - this guy I'm talking to, rightly named 'my first love' is my mind's focus at this moment in time. I can't believe that I still like him after so long, I mean I had a little crush on him when I was younger but as I said 'it was a crush', I would've expected to get over it by now - but I still like him.
The story is that I hadn't seen him in YEARS but it was only recently that we got back in contact with each other. So we talked on the phone for a few months and arranged a few dates but every single one fell through, (both our faults really). Now, I'm supposed to meet him and all I can say is 'WHATEVER'
I KNOW!!! After all that and I don't even care anymore, I really can't be bothered. It kinda gets to me that I'm not excited but then again I think I have reason not to be. Failed dates, when we talk there isn't much conversation, the fact that I still haven't seen him, I don't think you can blame me for not being excited. And despite all that I've said, I know exactly why I don't want to be excited - I might meet him and find out that I actually don't like him. That would crush me, it really would. Imagine me, liking him all this time, secretly hoping that he might be the ONE, only to find out that 'WE' could never happen. It would crush me.... and my mum. LOL. My mum absolutely adores him, come to think of it - so does my DAD. But I won't know anything 'til the end of this week - and I'm apprehensive. Apprehensive because next week could be the start of a new sector in my life. I might no longer be a 'crush hoe' - Gabrielle might actually settle down.
'YEAH RIGHT', I hear you say, but it could happen. NEVER SAY NEVER.
Oh yeah - what do I wear? I want to look nice but don't want to come off as desperate. Oh my!! Gabrielle actually cares what people think this time ( I must really like him). I want him to at least see an improvement in me since the last time he saw me - party dress and hairband to match. MEMORIES!!!
- Gabrielle
P.P.S my laptops gone until after exams so I might not be posting until I get some other computer access so if I don't write for a while, you know why!! KISSES x x x
Saturday, May 06, 2006
Kick 'Mr Potential' to the curb...Apparently
For some reason I seem to have a lot of time on my hands, cause every time I post, I've either watched or read something that I have to share and guess what...Today is no exception! The title just struck me so I had to read it,
KICK MR POTENTIAL TO THE CURB! (I couldn't believe it...When u finally find 'Mr right' whoever he may be, why would you want to let go?)
Yes, that sounds harsh, But this is the man you like and could learn to love. This is a guy who has drama. He is a walking headache. This guy is the one you run from like the wind. Life wont get any better with this guy. The only person that can help him is himself! Mr Potential has to create his own life. You cant try to make it for him. He has to get past the potential and learn to be a man for himself, by himself
You then think to yourself "do I want to be happy or do I want to survive?" Life is more then survival. Go for the happiness and kick Mr. Potential with no ambition to the curb.
So im sitting there thinking OH, the distinction has to be made between Mr Potential and Mr Right. Mr Potential has the qualities to become Mr Right but is not quite there...hmmm so im reminiscing about my past relations and conclude that I seem to be confusing Mr Right (a.k.a the guy I've never met)with actual Mr Potential's ( a.k.a my ex-boyfriend)? That could explain my single status now (which I have no problem with...sometimes) but then again, how do you differentiate the two when the characteristics seem so similar? Am I confusing u? Because I sure am confused! Is it really possible to kick 'Mr Potential' to the curb, cant I just train him to being a Mr Superb?....Nah, these books on life lessons can only be taken so far, look at me trying to re-evaluate future relationships, let me just leave it up to whatever God has planned.
x_soul sista_x
KICK MR POTENTIAL TO THE CURB! (I couldn't believe it...When u finally find 'Mr right' whoever he may be, why would you want to let go?)
Yes, that sounds harsh, But this is the man you like and could learn to love. This is a guy who has drama. He is a walking headache. This guy is the one you run from like the wind. Life wont get any better with this guy. The only person that can help him is himself! Mr Potential has to create his own life. You cant try to make it for him. He has to get past the potential and learn to be a man for himself, by himself
You then think to yourself "do I want to be happy or do I want to survive?" Life is more then survival. Go for the happiness and kick Mr. Potential with no ambition to the curb.
So im sitting there thinking OH, the distinction has to be made between Mr Potential and Mr Right. Mr Potential has the qualities to become Mr Right but is not quite there...hmmm so im reminiscing about my past relations and conclude that I seem to be confusing Mr Right (a.k.a the guy I've never met)with actual Mr Potential's ( a.k.a my ex-boyfriend)? That could explain my single status now (which I have no problem with...sometimes) but then again, how do you differentiate the two when the characteristics seem so similar? Am I confusing u? Because I sure am confused! Is it really possible to kick 'Mr Potential' to the curb, cant I just train him to being a Mr Superb?....Nah, these books on life lessons can only be taken so far, look at me trying to re-evaluate future relationships, let me just leave it up to whatever God has planned.
x_soul sista_x
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
Why AfroDivas was created?
AfroDivas was created so that we could voice our opinions, our thoughts, random feelings we had which we wanted to share with others. In creating such a blog, we decided that we would allow readers to post comments and voice their own opinion on whatever we had said. So you could say we gave readers the chance to say their piece. Compared to some blogs I've come across, we just don't leave comments that portray our blogs to be perfect, cos it's far from that... I mean we're only writing about how we feel. You can't blame us for that.
So, with saying that Im gonna wrap this up. To the faithful readers, thanks for reading, thanks for visiting the site. We greatly appreciated the fact that you continued to read our blogs. But we are sorry to say that AfroDivas has now ended. Due to numerous comments prior to the last blog, we have all concluded to stop writing. Again, we would like to thank you for your support and your insightful comments.
God Bless x x x
OH PUURRLLEASSEEEEE!! No one could get rid of this blog even if they tried. Basically, it's like this... you like the site, by all means stop by when it suits you, read our posts, leave a comment if needs be, but please, PLEASE don't be ignorant. I mean if you don't agree with what has been said in a post please don't be immature about it and leave a wack ass comment, 'anonymous' - 'this is some weak blog'. NO!! You know what you should do, leave a comment telling us why you don't agree with what was said and what you would do in that situation. It's called 'constructive criticism'... then again, if you still don't agree with what's said on a post... leave the site. I know you see that red 'X' button on the top right corner... I aint gonna be mad at you for using it. DAMMMNNNN!!! So yeah, we're gonna keep the posts coming and hopefully you guys won't stop reading.
AU REVOIR
- Gabrielle
So, with saying that Im gonna wrap this up. To the faithful readers, thanks for reading, thanks for visiting the site. We greatly appreciated the fact that you continued to read our blogs. But we are sorry to say that AfroDivas has now ended. Due to numerous comments prior to the last blog, we have all concluded to stop writing. Again, we would like to thank you for your support and your insightful comments.
God Bless x x x
OH PUURRLLEASSEEEEE!! No one could get rid of this blog even if they tried. Basically, it's like this... you like the site, by all means stop by when it suits you, read our posts, leave a comment if needs be, but please, PLEASE don't be ignorant. I mean if you don't agree with what has been said in a post please don't be immature about it and leave a wack ass comment, 'anonymous' - 'this is some weak blog'. NO!! You know what you should do, leave a comment telling us why you don't agree with what was said and what you would do in that situation. It's called 'constructive criticism'... then again, if you still don't agree with what's said on a post... leave the site. I know you see that red 'X' button on the top right corner... I aint gonna be mad at you for using it. DAMMMNNNN!!! So yeah, we're gonna keep the posts coming and hopefully you guys won't stop reading.
AU REVOIR
- Gabrielle
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
Looks sooo fine....err...nah!
Have you every looked back at people you had crushes on and thought
....what was i thinking? or ....what happened?
Because thats what happened to me yesterday when i bumped into this boy i had a BIG thing for. I remember when he was the cutest guy in my class...sort of like a young Will Smith (he had those cute ears too!) lol. But i guess time was not kind to him, let me give you a description...his face had aged considerably i almost didnt recognise him! his head was a sideways oval shape and his torso was half the size it should be, also sideways oval shaped. *sigh* I swear I nearly jumped back, and before you guys get all judgemental on me, never did I claim to be a beauty queen...but I'm HONEST people!
I also remember he was one of the smartest and most athletic people in my class, i always thought of him as being really sucessful one day. So while we were talking i asked him all the typical questions, what he was doing now? etc.. Basically he is now a father of two with the third on the way and he used to work at a corner shop, but was now in the process of choosing a new career path (unemployed).
Maybe he was never really that cute, i mean this was a crush back in primary school!! I have always been a fan of dark chocolate skinned bruthas and i went to a school that was 98.5% white. So the lack of chocolate made me find anything attractive, lol.
Its another story of a really smart black man who isnt reaching his full potential, a shame really 'cos he had the abitlity to do anything.
I guess it was naive of me to think everyone that i knew would be happy and successful.
- SistaLova
....what was i thinking? or ....what happened?
Because thats what happened to me yesterday when i bumped into this boy i had a BIG thing for. I remember when he was the cutest guy in my class...sort of like a young Will Smith (he had those cute ears too!) lol. But i guess time was not kind to him, let me give you a description...his face had aged considerably i almost didnt recognise him! his head was a sideways oval shape and his torso was half the size it should be, also sideways oval shaped. *sigh* I swear I nearly jumped back, and before you guys get all judgemental on me, never did I claim to be a beauty queen...but I'm HONEST people!
I also remember he was one of the smartest and most athletic people in my class, i always thought of him as being really sucessful one day. So while we were talking i asked him all the typical questions, what he was doing now? etc.. Basically he is now a father of two with the third on the way and he used to work at a corner shop, but was now in the process of choosing a new career path (unemployed).
Maybe he was never really that cute, i mean this was a crush back in primary school!! I have always been a fan of dark chocolate skinned bruthas and i went to a school that was 98.5% white. So the lack of chocolate made me find anything attractive, lol.
Its another story of a really smart black man who isnt reaching his full potential, a shame really 'cos he had the abitlity to do anything.
I guess it was naive of me to think everyone that i knew would be happy and successful.
- SistaLova
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