2008 has really brought about a change in the way I act and in the way I think. I really feel like this is the year that is going to ‘make me,’ I had to let go of unnecessary baggage. I ended ‘2007’ saying goodbye to all those ‘guys’ I couldn’t quite get over, as drastic as it might seem, it was much needed! I found myself being distracted to the highest degree over these guys and nothing positive was coming from such distractions, I concentrated so much on them that I lost sight of what I was actually supposed to be focusing on, e.g university. I do not know how I passed my second year but I see this year as another chance and I’m not taking that for granted.
Everything had been going the way I wanted, but what life exists without drama! A slight hiccup in my positive attitude when I heard from my ex, (summer ‘like’), it wasn’t good news!! I was not happy!! I am definitely over it now but it did make me start thinking about so many things, with the bad news I had heard I just wanted something that would help revert my attitude back to the way it was, so I picked up a book, ‘I Kissed Dating Goodbye’, by Joshua Harris, and through reading that book I have decided to kiss dating goodbye. Initial thoughts, ‘hmm, how am I going to kiss dating goodbye – dating is a way of life, if I don’t date I will never find my husband, if I don’t date I won’t even have a boyfriend’, so many things ran through my mind - I was sure I had taken the book too literally but the more I thought about it, the more I thought I could actually reap some benefits from doing this.
To be honest, my ‘love life’ was not active in the first place, so I really don’t think it will be that much of a challenge, lol, it’s not going to be easy but I don’t think it will be that hard. The book specifies that ‘dating’ takes place when two people request to spend time with each other, on several different occasions in seemingly romantic places. The mission is not to allow myself to be ‘secluded’ with the opposite sex (I really don’t think this is going to be hard) and if I do want to go out it must be with a group of 4 or more. I could say 3 or more but I know too many people who think that by taking a third party their motives will not be as obvious, well it is!! Leave Keisha at home, the guy is interested in you, its not like you are going to pay any attention to Keisha on the date anyway.
I don’t know how long this mission is supposed to be, I want to see how it goes really. I think this mission will help cure the ‘crush hoe’ in me, the ‘infatuationist’ (I know that is not a word), but seriously, I have a tendency (and I’m not alone) to see a guy and become obsessed, no, obsessed is too strong a word. All I’m saying is, I first see a guy and all my thoughts and actions are based on that person, I might not know everything I need to know about that person but in my head, he’s perfect. He’ll be the perfect companion, the perfect partner, the perfect husband, the perfect father and that is all from just looking at him, I really don’t think so!! I think this is where so many people make mistakes, I see someone and imagine them to be something that they are not, when I do find out that they are nothing like I imagined, I lose interest! I could have saved wasting precious time by not thinking so deeply into what I could gain from them and concentrate more on what I can possibly offer a partner in my future.
Basically, this task will help me focus, I don’t want to be thinking about dating, marriage, I just want to live my life. Its funny how once you get to a certain age you’re supposed to have ‘potentials’ lined up, you’re supposed to have been thinking about your life partner and honestly that is not the case. Being told from when you were old enough to talk to about 19/20 to ‘read your books’, then suddenly at the age of 21, you’re being asked where your husband/wife is!! This dating thing is so complicated, its actually confusing, so on behalf of the young generation I have taken it upon myself to embark upon this mission. This might provide me with revelations that many women are waiting on and the same revelations that men are keen to know. I can’t wait to see where this mission takes me, please keep your eyes peeled for further updates because I will be posting up my progress or struggles. I may need your help!!
